A few things about me, I love to read, I love a good movie, I can’t help but be drawn in by pop culture and lament and despair are two of my favorite words.
Weird yes, lament and despair, I just love their descriptive nature and the way they make you feel deep things when you hear them. I think I might just be a little off but hey at least i’m honest. This is why I love movies such as It’s a Wonderful Life and Little Women. Today’s focus will be Little Women, don’t worry we will eventually get to It’s a Wonderful Life.
Little women is one of my favorite books and movies (the 90’s version with Winona Ryder and Kirsten Dunst). I don’t even know how many times i’ve watched it and disected it and turned it off right after Laurie proposes to Jo (and right before the awkward spit string kiss). Right about here.
Even though i’m not always a fan of the ending and I almost always want to turn it off right here, if you watch past this part you will come across a scene that so speaks into my life and struggles that i’ve had. You see Jo is a young woman with lots of passion and creative energy in a time where that wasn’t really smiled upon. She had all of this personality and passion welling up inside of her and no real outlet. Jo was not the norm.
Jo March: “Well, of course Aunt March prefers Amy over me. Why shouldn’t she? I’m ugly and awkward and I always say the wrong things. I fly around throwing away perfectly good marriage proposals. I love our home, but I’m just so fitful and I can’t stand being here! I’m sorry, I’m sorry Marmee. There’s just something really wrong with me. I want to change, but I – I can’t. And I just know I’ll never fit in anywhere.”
This scene, this quote, this statement always jumps out at me, it always makes me stop and think. Makes me look at my life and the many times i’ve wanted to run away or to just be someone else, do something easier, to be normal.
Being a christian I have struggled with this knowing the path that i’ve chosen is not the norm, knowing I will never fit in here. I’ve wanted it to be easier, i’ve wanted to walk through life not having to think so much, not feeling so much responsibility but I know better and I know that this path this narrow road isn’t all for nothing. Now don’t misunderstand me i’ve never entertained the thought of giving up on the Lord or walking away from Him, no way because i’ve seen the blessings I know the ending to my journey and I have a personal relationship with the One who died for me. I would never give that up. I don’t know what i’d do without my Lord. I’ve just wanted things a little easier.
Just as Jo says I love my life don’t get me wrong I have an amazing life with amazing people to share it with but this is not my home. Following Christ is not the norm. I will never be normal, I will always stick out like a sore thumb if I don’t somethings wrong. The thing is I was never, you as a Christian were never promised things would be easy. We were never promised that once we chose to follow Christ our lives with magically be a breeze. No, in fact we are told “For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.” Matthew 7:14 but we are also promised “that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life.” and that is a promise I cling to and rejoice in.
The point is that I know i’m not the only one out there who feels this way sometimes but I also know that when it comes down to it I wouldn’t trade this life the choice I made to follow Christ for anything in the world. Why? Because this world is perishing and fleeting but my God is eternal and my life, our lives are worth more than anything this world has to offer. How do I know that? Because if it wasn’t Christ wouldn’t have died to save it. He wouldn’t have died on the cross to save us from death, to save us from ourselves.
So be encouraged my friends “and let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart” Galatians 6:8